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Rejection ~ Don’t Take It To Heart
It is really easy when someone rejects you to take it to heart and let it rock your self-esteem. Please don’t! I know it really hurts to feel rejected when someone doesn’t call, your relationship doesn’t progress or ends. Let me take a little of the sting away.
It is important to consider what we can learn and change for the better. However, if you’re finding that you’re feeling really stuck in the hurt and wondering what was wrong with you, it is a sign that you may have wandered off track with your thinking.
While it may seem that there was something wrong or not good enough about you, in truth this is usually not the case. The other person is most often just doing what feels right for them in the moment and this has nothing to do with your worth as a person. It really is all about them and not about you.
Often people only have a superficial perception or image of you. It takes time and effort to really get to know a person. People also project their issues and expectations onto others. Chances are the real you was never rejected at all. Why? Because they never really knew you.
Also, often it is not you being rejected but what you may represent. Someone who just wants to date may turn you down because you want to be in something more than casual. A commitment-phobe may love you deeply but still break up with you because on a deep subconscious level he or she is turning down a committed relationship.
Other people may fear disappointing you, are not ready, can’t meet your needs, still in love with their ex, have a pattern of sabotaging good things, fail to appreciate you, only fancy redheads or have some other random tastes, or have personal issues which block them in love and relationships. None of this has anything to do with you.
There is a difference between disappointment and rejection. The person may have disappointed you but not actually rejected you personally. What other people do is almost never about you. Take back your power and know you are a beautiful and worthy human being, deserving of love, and determine your own value.
There is a soulmate out there who is looking for you and who will be kind, loving and will appreciate you. The sooner you remember your worth, the sooner they can find you.
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I used to think there was something wrong with me; like he misjudged and just assumed about me but that’s on him, not me. People aren’t always what they seem, love cannot be blind and rejection may hurt but in reality its just saving you from an insecure, troublesome person.
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Absolutely. If a guy breaks up with you, then he’s just not your man. Simple as that.... It’s a good thing because it frees you to find your real soulmate who will stay with you. X
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Hi Caroline, you wouldn’t believe how perfect the timing of this email to me after battling at almost 67 with a break up with a man I thought I had something with after a long break of five years without a male friend. Add to that an ex contacted me and when we met up, he continued to ‘put me down’ and then be in total denial about it when I pointed it out to him. Fortunately for me I had a mutual friend from the states who was visiting, they heard it and thought it cruel of him. I don’t give very easily unless I feel I can trust the other person and this ex has been part of the problem putting me into much self doubt until I became wise to his ways. Bless you x
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You’re so very welcome Patricia. Stay strong and know you are worthy and the right person will come along. It’s a blessing both these guys have been moved along! xx
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I soooo enjoyed reading this post. I felt you were right on point, you made a whole lot of sense, and I found much comfort in it. Reading this post was a reminder that we are resposible for the people we choose to associate ourselves with. Thank you.
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Thank you honey, much appreciated x
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Excellent article. In the past I have settled and the man and relationship was not meeting my needs or I clung due to wanting security or not wanting to be alone. I know now this was self-limiting behavior on my part. Now I’m holding out for the real thing. I know there is a man out there who will appreciate my values and love me for me.
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Thank you Whit. And you do deserve that special person x
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Hi Caroline, your article has brought me light. Thank you. My boyfriend broke up with me recently. I feel much better about myself after reading your post. Thanks.
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Hi Hazel, it’s my pleasure. Love and light to you. Feel better soon x
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Received my card for the week today 3 of Wands.....it lead me to this blog. I am really happy about the decision that I have made to let this man of 2 years go as it is not about me it is his perception of a commitment and all his past hurts. The 3 of wands just concreted my decision that is all. He was a cheap anyway so no real loss.
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Bless you honey. Sounds like a good decision. X
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WOW, I was stuck in the darkness, it was so dark being a single parent of a suddenly very sick child and also suddenly rejected by my ex who things were working out with since the break up was from outside circumstances. He is rejecting the responsibility of the illness, he is rejecting reality and I am the one who keeps bringing the reality to him. WOW, with this understanding I can see a glimpse of light!
Thank you!
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Hugs xxx
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Thank you for this post. It came just in time for me as divine intervention and right on the spot.
It was hard for me to accept that my boyfriend walked out on me just like that. No word, no call, nothing.
I needed to hear/read that, ‘What other people do is almost never about you.’
What do I do if i decide I’d like to have a reading? Thanks!
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Thank you so much Rumi. I am really glad the post helped you when you needed it as I wrote it with that very intention. If you would like a reading please just check to see if I’m online or make a booking using the online calendar. Lots of love and big hugs xx
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I am new to this stuff but have discovered loads which is positively helpful since I stumbled on your blog x
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Merry Christmas Caroline...
With Lots Of Love...
- Bhagyashree
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Hi, I dont know what to say except that I am in love with this guy totally. We’ve been an item for the last four years but now he does not want to be with me. I just cant get past the pain. I get that he is allowed to change his mind but it still hurts.
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Hi Caroline, I’d love to help you with this. Call me?
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Hi Caroline. It must of been fate that brought me here. My fiancé just told me six weeks ago that after 15 years together he doesn’t love me anymore and never has. He let me book a wedding that he had no intention of going through with. I was devastated and I am still coming to terms with it. We have a mortgage so we are still in the same house. At times is so painful but I will get there in the end I hope x
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Hi Jenny, I am so sorry that you are going through this. I would love to help you with a reading. Can you schedule a time with me? http://www.meetme.so/lotustarotanna I will also write a post today to help you. X
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This is an excellent post.
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